Hey, Have You Seen The 90s?

I missed the 90s. Really, really missed those 90s time. Those were the best time of my youth. Everything was superbly amazing. The style, the trend & the music; of the grunge and alternative rock era where everything was so simple and pure.

I was in my late teen circa 92 -93, being 18-19 years of age and just coming out of a small town to further my study in one of the best and renowned university in the big city. Life was looking way much different in the big one. New place, new friends, new beginning. But that was what I had always wanted - to get out of the small, restricting town into a bigger world out there. Nirvana was already a big name then from 1988 with its smashing teen-rock-angst ‘Nevermind’. And so the whole grunge era started and goodbye glam rock of the 80s!

I was one of those lucky youth who gets to spend my younger time listening to quality music and experiencing those alternative-grunge phase. It’s not even justice calling it a phase ‘cos it sure does stay on and lingered in my heart ‘til now.

There were those flared-boot cut-jeans that are so flattering to any body shape that replaced the old ‘carrot-cut’ jeans of the 80s which now they called skinny jeans or whatever. How ugly!

Long-haired, shaggy haircuts were on every young male that ever walked the earth. And if it’s not the hair, it’s the plaid, flannel shirt and the torn in the knee-boot-cut jeans that adorned them. Ladies alike were wearing those jeans too, paired up with a baby tee and a platform shoes! Then the style and trend were really, really original. Cute grandma & baby doll dresses on the girls, even the radios too were playing mostly rock songs of Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Red Hot Chili Pepper, etc. Those were the music; those were the ones that we sang to day and night.

Amazing time of self-discovery, friendship and love; and how I now long for that time again. How I wish I could relived those moments in time for me to know more and to know better. Although it is always a wishful thinking, I couldn’t help praying that God will give me that miracle to be back there at that time again. How I wish I will do things differently.

What I missed most is the good sounds of the 90s. The Lemonheads were damn fine and popular, and so were other acts like the Soup Dragon, Better Than Ezra, Blind Melon, etc. to name a few that really changed my perspective of music and the likes of it.

I remembered every night in my dorm, I would religiously listened to Radio 4, RTM which is kind enough to play those songs, though filtered. That was the only one that offered us those alternative rock songs. Who even dream of digital radio station like Astro or MTV now? Or even private radio? Only THR solely existed for a private radio. And of course they too played those songs over the radio. There was no internet like now where I can just Google any information or download pictures or mp3 songs…there were no such things!

And yet we cut pictures, lyrics, anything that we can get our hands on and pasted them on our wall board…for us to admire those pictures and lyrics whenever we feel tired or bored of studying! Such simplicity and pureness. No pretentious or posers.

Those songs reflected my soul to the deepest core. I may not be in a relationship or doing drugs or drinking or disco dancing or whatever but those songs were my saviors, my escapee to a different world of my imagination. Sometimes I even imagined myself there singing in rhyme with them!!! A foolish idea others might think but we were young and so naturally we were attracted to that genre. We thought that they will never go away. We thought that we were so strong and solid and undeterred. How wrong we were.

When I was 20 the following year, River Pheonix died of OD. And then the founding father of grunge himself – Kurt Cobain in an unanswered, still debatable suicide. How devastated we were; to hear of these miseries. And yet we hold on to others to shine their light. But that was where we went downhill. Everything changed after that. Boy bands were taking over the airways, the clean cut mama boys’ look were in. Hip and booty gyrating hip hop and R&B ruled the airways and soon we were meeting our untimely death.

Life too took a different toll at this time. I was finishing my pre-university at that time and was on the lookout for places to stay. Suddenly, I lost track of time, place and people that I had become so familiar with. I was turning 21 in 95 and I was already feeling the burden of a responsible adult. And so, I lost myself in the waves of time from then on. I become what the society wants me to be. I behaved in the manner of what the society wants me to be. I became the very person that I vowed not to. But life took me into a direction that shaped and molded me to become of what I am today. I think I know that. I decided to do the right thing that I should - study hard, graduate and get a steady job.

And that’s when I realized that I lose myself more and more each day. I was detaching myself involuntarily from the escape world that I like so much that in the end, there were only emptiness left behind after all was done. Before I knew it, it was already 96, 97, 98 and 99 when I finally graduated.

Right before my eyes, the grunge was dead. And so there were only a few hopefuls. Bands disbanded or disappeared. Where did they go? Where did I go?

Now, much to the dismay of the past that went away unnoticed – I am now reliving those time again. Thanks to the internet, illegal downloads and all…I am able to get information that I wasn’t getting before. Though they come a tad too late, I am ever so grateful that at least I am permitted in my lifetime to revisit my past. Fashion comes and goes, people come and go. But true style, music and influence of my youth will always be deeply imprinted in my heart, soul and distant memory.

So goodbye, Nirvana, Lemonheads, Blind Melon, Toad the Wet Sprockets, Filter, Stone Temple Pilots, Pearl Jam, Hootie and the Blowfish, The Cranberries, Gin Blossoms, Better Than Ezra, , REM, Faith No More, The Spin Doctors, Soundgarden, Fuel, Lightning Seeds, Lit, Soul Asylum, Collective Soul….and countless others that are too worthy……goodbye. Thank you for stopping by into my youth and thank you too for the excellent sounds - brilliant talents that can never be replaced. As the saying goes ‘they don’t make music like they used to in the 90s!’…

Silly it seems but all is good. Some regrets are still here and there, knowing from time to time what I had missed during that lost time due to lack of sources. But I now have those songs to cherish me again at 34 years of age. I would give my utmost soul to go back again but somehow, I know that those melody makers are somewhere on earth, hopefully as peaceful and as fulfilled as they should deserved for. And as for those who had passed us by, rest in peace. We’ll never find another you.

Thank you from the heart to those that kept me company through the 90s. Thank you, thank you so much.

R.I.P

 ***This is something that i got through my email & i would like to share this with everyone who's concern enough to care.

Dear Friends,

       Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.

    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

    Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

    Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.  
    He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame and I'm A Victim.  
    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

   If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

All The Single Ladies!

 

 

 

Reflection of Raya Memories

               Raya datang, raya pergi….yang penting dalam gastric pun aku tetap mampu berpuasa walaupun agak teruk gak aku tergolek. Siang-siang memang dah jadi kewajipan TIDUR sampai pengsan sebab tu jer yang mampu aku buat untuk menahan sakit yang melampau. Mungkin lain kali aku kena makan ubat and tak payah nak berlagak kuat. Terima jer la hakikat yang aku dah tak se’tough’ dulu….

               Raya pada aku semenjak dari umur 12 tahun lagi dah aku rasa biasa ajer sebab mungkin aku ni dah period awal-awal dari umur 10 tahun lagi…jadi keseronokan aku macam kena short-cut sebab aku terpaksa jadi dewasa lebih cepat dari sepatutnya.  Tu ler pasal sekarang ni aku still cam budak-budak lagi perangai. Kes kempunan childhood...

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              Almaklumlah, masa tu bila dah period jer mula lah mak aku membebel suruh perangai baik-baik and macam-macam lagi la ceramah mak nenek….aku rasa sangat terkongkong masa tu. Buat apa pun tak boleh sebab aku kena ‘behave’ sedangkan umur aku pada amnya masih budak-budak. Aku ingat lagi yang masa aku kecik-kecik dulu memang raya best (masa umur 9 tahun ke bawah la)…mana-mana aku pegi sure dapat duit raya. Almaklumlah, aku ni muka memang cute masa kecik sebab abah aku orang Hindustan jadinyer aku tumpang ler glamer bintang-bintang filem yang famous-famous….ha ha ha…..(perasan!)

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             Time balik kampong lagi la especially sebab mak aku tu berketurunan Banjar dari Sungai Manik. Maka aku pun sangat-sangat la paham bahasa Banjar 100% walaupun dari paras rupa tak siapa percaya yang aku paham…sebab sebelum aku belajar BM & English, bahasa utama aku di rumah standard la Bahasa Banjar & Hindustan; sebab tu sampai sekarang aku rasa aku tak berapa pandai dalam BM formal dan aku terima kenyataan tu. Aku lagi terer English la kan siap buleh buat slang American accent sebab nyer masa aku kecik suka betol aku tengok rancangan ‘Sha-Na-Na’…(ni sesapa yang kanak-kanak time zaman awal 80an paham la)

             Melalut plak tadi kat Sg Manik kan? Oh sebab bila mak aku bawak kitorang adik-beradik balik kampong jumpa sedara mara, confirm la kitorang paling CUTE….heh heh…Yang lain tu rupa Banjar je la kan; gelap-gelap, kusam-kusam, dan semua yang berkaitan (jahat la aku nie)…Tu belum lagi balik Sabak Bernam kampong pakcik-pakcik aku! Semua kawin dengan pompuan Jawa makanya makcik2 aku pun majority Jawa!!! Bayangkanlah bila mak aku yang Banjar jumpa ipar-ipar Jawa; macam penguin cakap dengan kuda!!! Yang aku adik beradik tetap la tak paham amenda la yang diorang cakap ni….sebab aku makcik ajer Jawa tapi language nyer aku langsung tak tau satu aper pun. Tapi makcik-makcik aku pun memang suka kalau kami adik-beradik balik tempat diorang sebab lagi sekali la kitorang CUTE. Tu aje.

MyCutePictures.com

            Tu dulu la, time aku kecik. Memori tu aku ingat sampai sekarang. Main bunga api cucuk dengan batang pisang sebab mak dengan nenek aku takut badan kitorang terbakar. Pas tu tolong kacau mak time buat kuih. Puasa separuh hari. Tipu puasa pun ada! Zaman-zaman tu, memang aku takde toys yang canggih tapi aku tetap seronok walaupun berdua dengan kakak jer main. I wish I could turn back the time but I know it’s never gonna happen. Doa la sampai pengsan pun. Sekarang ni Raya cuma Raya superficial jer pada aku sebab yea la aku pun dah nak masuk 34. Mana sama kan masa umur time kecik? Dulu abah mak bagi duit raya sekarang aku la plak. Dulu time budak aku dapat duit raya time jalan-jalan rumah sedara & kenalan; sekarang aku la pulak yang kena bagi duit raya. How time flies and our roles have changed. Who knew?

           

             Tapi Aidilfitri tetap satu kemenangan pada aku. Kemenangan aku berpuasa dan menahan diri, aku rasa betul la cakap Uncle George, best friend abah aku. Walaupun dia Cina, tapi dia cakap kat aku yang fasting month is a month of self-reflection. Hhhmmm, betul tu. Memang kita kena reflex balik diri kita, bukannya bernafsu-nafsi makan minum cam kerbau lapar! Tapi ramai gak yang buat cam tu. Nasib baik aku tak termasuk dalam golongan membazir. Time berbuka pun aku makan ajer apa yang mak aku masak. Lagi kenyang. Lagi sedap.

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              Yang penting, aku ada 5 hari kena ganti puasa tahun ni. Kena la buat selang seli sebab nyer aku kena jaga kesihatan aku gak…oklah, masih lagi Syawal. Pada yang sudi baca blog aku ni, walaupun cerita aku takde la best sangat…SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI; MAAF SALAH DAN SILAP AKU, ok geng!

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Wassalam. 

UNTUK INA

 

ROAD BLOCK!

Had a good time ever during the school break although it was in the middle of a fasting month…as usual my place of choice is KL where majority of my friends reside. Makes one wonder sometimes why did I end up working outside KL? I guess its fate but it’s not too bad after all.

Anyways, I went to KL on a Friday, just a few days before the school session reopens. Of course the ever so lovely Fairuz invited us all for a sleepover at her house and a sahur session with the gang.

One word of advice, never ever arrived in KL by 4 or 5 pm coz that’s when the traffic jam starts. But had to endure it anyway, coz u gotta feel what the KL-lites are experiencing day after day.

Anyway, we break fast at Tini’s (my usual ‘lepak' port) and had a good home cooked food courtesy of Linda (thanks Linda for the food!)

After my friends had performed their ‘tarawikh’ from Masjid Bangsar, we were making our way to Fairuz. Oops, forgot to mention that K Lin came with her only girl, Princess Sarah..and then off we go! (Thanx K Lin for driving as moi’s eyesight is not that good at nite driving these days)

After we arrived, we headed straight to her home somewhere in ***** ****….and she greeted us like her usual bubbly self. I was introduced to her son who is so cute…must be the good genes from mommy and daddy!

And by 3am we were heading to some mamak joint in SS2. By this time we were in K Yate’s car…(thanx K Yate for driving again for a zillion times)…

As we were busy talking in the car suddenly the rows of car in front of us started to slow down (and of course somebody mentioned a road block ahead)…

And yes it was a ROAD BLOCK….and suddenly we all kept quiet ‘til u can hear a pin dropped! All quiet and still inside the car…and we didn’t say a word but to just keep quiet and drove off as we were not stopped!

The thing is, we were a bunch of 30 something girls in the car (minus Linda). All of us carried a valid driving license and we were all not drunk! Heck, we were going for a sahur session, for goodness sake!

I guess in the end, we were still that 18-19 year olds like the last time we were together; way, way back in UM when we were first introduced to the joy of nite life! How scared and timid we were. Time may have flies so fast but some aspect of our lives still is stuck there. Inside, we are that young girls of 18-19 years of age. We were so happy and so carefree then.

In fact, I dare say that the best of my lives were my UM days where I was surrounded by good friends. We drifted apart after graduation to work….and we did lose connection for more than 5 years. But thanks a lot to Facebook, we were rekindling old friendship that is hard to replace no matter how many new friends you get. We even had reunion and get together now….and its fun now since we have the money and the transport…

To me a good friend no matter how fast you get them or how long you have in gaining them is all a worth life treasure. No matter where life takes you, your friend will always be there and loyal to you. So don’t ever leave a friend for a man or anything else. Coz anywhere that you go, it is always the good friend that you end up returning to…

Going back to the road block story, it was a tale to be joked and laughed at during our sahur session while enjoying that enormous roti tissue, teh ais and nasi goreng ayam!!!