I BID ADIEU, SAMBAL BELACAN

We had a farewell lunch for a staff yesterday’s afternoon. As usual, we were served those typical Malay dish of plain rice, ‘ayam goreng rempah’, ‘kari ikan’, ‘sayur campur’, ‘ulam’ and of course, the ‘sambal belacan’.

‘SAMBAL BELACAN’. Now that is a delicacy that I have to make do without these days. In fact, this has been the norm for me for the past 5 years already. Along with other favorites like ‘sambal udang with petai’, ‘sambal sotong’,’ketam masak lemak cili api’, shells like ‘lala masak pedas’, etc.

A lot of people would be bewildered with my reservations over those delightful foods. Among colleagues, I am forever doomed as someone who’s not enjoying one of the guilty pleasures of the world; eating ‘sambal belacan’ and seafood, except fish (selected ones, that is).

Once upon a time, it used to be a side dish that I cannot do without. For all the grilled fish or chicken that I had, it will be coupled with ‘sambal belacan’ mixed with tamarind juice for that extra kick-ass feel. Now, those will only be parts of my gastronomy history. I guess the saying of too much of everything will kill you in the end is right. I should have that moderation thingy reminder with me during those times but having said that, I owe all faults to none other than myself and now I must pay for the past deeds.

It is never the intention of mine to deny all these glorious food. But over the past five years, I had developed an allergic condition called ‘resdung’ which is already a nuisance as it is; what more with seafood? It will just trigger the happy mucus to come out from my nostrils non-stop - not to mention blocking them tunnels as well. (gross details, I know…)

I do want to eat that ‘sambal belacan’, so, so badly. There I was, standing in front of those grounded and pounded red chillies and shrimp paste. Looking and contemplating. Do I take it? Even for a minuscule size? Just to satisfy my cravings. And then suffer the consequences later? This was a very difficult situation. One part of me was saying to hell with the allergic reactions and just go for it. Another side somehow was telling me to remember the past unpleasant after-effects of consuming those forbidden side dish dip.

So I piled on my plain rice into that plastic plate. I scooped the fish curry and the gravy. I took the fried chicken too. I dig at the mix vegetables and got them out. And the bowl of the ‘sambal belacan’ was still there; still full, still inviting.

…And I walked away before the temptations took over and ruined everything that the doctor warned me against. I remembered the awful and dreadful after effects - the sneezing, the itchy nose, the watery eyes, the blocked nose. As much as I wanted that succulent ‘sambal belacan’, I just don’t think I’ll be able to stand the allergic reactions anymore. Not to mention the outbreak on my face and body as well. I think I will learn to let go of one of Malaysia’s favorite side dish – the ‘sambal belacan’.

So…..finally, this is goodbye to a long-time love whom I will see often; but can never have ‘it’ that way again. No regrets.